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REAL ESTATE

When do-it-yourself jobs are best left to the pros

Wannabe seamstress winds up threadbare

By Inman News Feed

Add Comment | Comments: 0 | Posted Apr. 4, 2012

Wannabe seamstress winds up threadbare

Alisha Alway Braatz
Inman News®

My friend Melissa is amazing. And by amazing, I mean, unbelievable. She can do anything. I have watched her design her own eco-friendly home, complete three acres of landscaping with a boyfriend and a shovel, grow her own garden, build her own chicken roost, and make jams, jellies, cookies, roasts, cocktails and more look e-a-s-y.

When people compare her to Martha Stewart, I just laugh. My money's on Melissa in any contest of ingenuity and wit.

Melissa is so impressive that she became a bit of an inspiration for our little family. Why, if Melissa can make couch cushions out of recycled flour bags, then I'm sure I could make a pillow case!

And maybe I could hem my own pants? Or make beanbags. So, I gamely took out the sewing machine my mother gifted me more than 10 years ago.

I actually removed the sewing machine from its original packaging, as I had ... ahem ... never actually opened the box before. Something about sewing at home seemed very lonely and very domestic.

Meanwhile, my husband decided to do a few little fix-em-ups around the house. I was so pleased! On the list: the drippy faucet in the master bathroom and the clogged dryer vent line under the house. Simple stuff. No problem.

We planned to meet back in the kitchen at 3 p.m. and plan a savory, organic dinner. Off to our projects we went!

First, I had to string -- I mean "thread" -- the machine. Now, where was that thread? I tore the Singer box apart looking for some. Seriously? You mean these things don't come with thread?

Meanwhile, I heard a loud banging coming from the bathroom. I went to investigate.

What I found was more than disheartening.

There was my dear husband leaning on a crowbar -- trying to remove the entire sink. Hey, it's just a drippy faucet!

"Can I call a plumber, babe?"

I'm sure you already know the answer to that question. Absolutely, "No."

I took a deep breath and turned away. It's really better not to watch. And I had to buy some thread anyway, so I took off for the Wal-Mart Super Center.

When I arrived home, he was nowhere to be seen. I figured this was good news, and proceeded to my brightly lit little corner in the den. Here comes a pillow case! And baby clothes, and monogrammed hotpads, and aprons, and more!

The sewing machine manual is so thin, I think, this is going to be cake.

Well.

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