When local nonpolitics news makes the Drudge Report with an all-caps “SHOCK” in the headline, you know it’s gotta be good. And it is.
CBS 3 is reporting that Matthew Clemmens, a 21-year-old Cherry Hill, N.J., man, caused quite the ruckus at Wednesday night’s Phillies game against the Nationals. Allegedly at a papal-level of drunkenness (Benedict V or Leo XI), he intentionally—and we mean intentionally—threw up on an 11-year-old girl, the daughter of Captain Michael Vangelo of the Eason Police Department. He threw beer and insults at the family, as well.
Vangelo told CBS 3, “I actually heard the individual behind me say, 'I'm gonna get sick', then I couldn't believe what I saw. He actually had his fingers down his mouth and into his throat to make himself vomit. He vomited and lurched forward and it was hitting my daughter.”
The Inky’s Philly Confidential says the man then “slugged [Vangelo] in the head several times.” Another off-duty Easton cop punched Clemens, but not until after the Dirty Jerzzyite “doused the girl in vomit.” Then, Vangelo and several other fans held Clemmens down while Philadelphia police came to arrest him. But, as Philadelphia police spokesman Lt. Frank Vanore said: “He fought with them for a little while. He apparently threw up on one of the officers, too.”
As fate would have it, “a great fan caught a ball and he gave it to my daughter. She slept with the ball last night and when I woke her up this morning for school, the ball was still in her hand," Vangelo said.
Clemmens is waiting to be arraigned on simple assault, aggravated assault, reckless endangerment, harassment, disorderly conduct and resisting arrest. There's a great user comment on Philly Confidential's site that describes Clemmens as "Typical Animal."
We can party at a Phillies game (beers are up to $7.25, by the way) with the best of them, but, uh, this guy is way out of our league.
At the height of the hatred directed at Matt "Pukemon" Clemmens, his uncle claims his innocence. And that's not going over too well.