Getting an e-card is always nice.
Unless it says: “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know I had STDs when we were together. You should get tested.”
The card is one of six designs found at www.stdphilly.org, which sounds like a place you go to acquire a disease but actually offers helpful information about STDs and treatment. The cards are an anonymous way to let past partners know that you exposed them to something noxious. There’s even one in Spanish.
According to the site, the greatest risks for those in our demographic are chlamydia, HPV and herpes. Oh, the clairvoyance! It’s like they’ve been reading our medical records.
If we got one of these cards, our first thought would be that it was a prank by one of our friends, despite the website’s request to “Please respect the community and don't use these cards to spam.”
Our second thought would be to go to the bathroom for a self exam.
While it seems a little classless to send an e-card instead of nutting up and making a phone call, at least the cards are a way for the more timid among us (though not so timid to avoid the disease-spreading circumstances in the first place) to make the unfortunate but important confession.
After all, better to get the news through an e-card than an unexpected rash.