Savage Love

By Dan Savage
Add Comment Add Comment | Comments: 0 | Posted Aug. 10, 2011

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Since I told her, she’s been asking me hypothetical questions like, “Would you put your thumb up my butt?” I quickly say, “Of course.” She comes back with, “Would you poop on me?” I’m a bit slower to answer that question, but I say, “Yes, if that’s something you wanted, I would do it.” Then she laughs and tells me, “Raise your standards.” I’m confused. Is she secretly into these things and afraid to tell me? (I know the fear one feels about revealing a sexual kink.) She’s brought it up more than once.


A part of me is hoping there is something kinky she’s after, since it would most definitely free me up to go to town on her feet.


Honestly Into Nasty Things


A: Kink cards on the table at seven months. Well done, HINT. As for these bizarre conversations …


Either your girlfriend is worried that you’ve got kinks you haven’t told her about yet—like BPG—or she believes that having a kink means a person has no sexual limits or boundaries at all. Her comment when you indicated that you would shit on her, if that was something she wanted (“Raise your standards”), is a good indication that she’s not into shit. She’s latching onto worst-kink scenarios, HINT, and seeing if you’ll “go there,” because it confirms her prejudices about kinky people, i.e., that there’s nothing a kinky person won’t do.


You didn’t do yourself any favors when you agreed to shit on the girlfriend. That won’t inspire her to let you go to town on her feet. Instead, HINT, tell your girlfriend she should be thankful she’s dating an honest foot fetishist and not a dishonest necrophiliac—lots of men are kinky, your kinks could be worse—and let her know that you’re ready, willing and able to explore her kinks, if she has any, but then list a few of the things you won’t do. (Shit on her, for one.) And when she’s ready to share her kinks with you, tell her she knows where to find you: on the floor, going to town on her feet.


Confidential to everybody: Don’t think a guy in pantyhose can be hot? Check out the insanely hot guys—in pantyhose, panties, and camisoles—at xdress.com. Then answer this question: Are these guys so hot they’d be hot in anything, including panties, or do panties make these hot guys even hotter?

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