Savage Love

By Dan Savage
Add Comment Add Comment | Comments: 0 | Posted Apr. 17, 2013

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I am uncircumcised, and the opening at the end of my foreskin is not large enough for the head of my penis to pass through. This means my foreskin doesn’t pull back when I get an erection. The Internet says this is a condition called “phimosis,” and a lot of medical websites recommend circumcision. I don’t have pain or difficulty with sex or urination. The foreskin isn’t stuck or fused to the glans—the hole is just small. Is there a safe, nonsurgical way to enlarge the opening in the foreskin?

Dick Hole Panic

 

“Tell Dick Hole Panic not to panic,” says Dr. Stephen H. King, a urologist in Washington State and my new go-to guy for all questions dick. “Phimosis occurs in an uncircumcised penis when a circular ring of the foreskin becomes scarred, often from prior infection, inflammation or trauma. This scar prevents the normally elastic tissue of the foreskin from fully retracting to expose the head of the penis.”

Roughly one in 100 men have phimosis, says King, “and depending on the degree of narrowing, complications of phimosis can vary widely. These can include difficulty with cleaning/hygiene, infection, pain with erection, bleeding from skin cracking and paraphimosis.” Paraphimosis sounds like something you want to avoid: “It occurs when a narrow foreskin is pulled back to expose the head of the penis but then can’t be pulled back over the head, which then constricts blood flow to the glans,” says King. Paraphimosis can cut off blood flow to the head of the penis, which can cause the head of your cock to become gangrenous and die, which is why anyone suffering from it should head to an emergency room immediately. Here’s something else to worry about: “Although extremely rare, penile cancer can arise, usually in older patients with recurrent infections/inflammation.”

You’re probably panicking now, DHP—hell, hearing about paraphimosis has me panicking, and I’m circumcised. But the doctor says your case doesn’t sound serious: You aren’t experiencing any pain, your dick seems to work fine, you haven’t suffered from a series of infections. You don’t need to do anything about your phimosis for now, says King, but if you’re worried about complications arising in the future, or if you want your sex partners to see the head of your dick someday, there are nonsurgical remedies.

“‘Preputial gymnastics is one way to resolve phimosis,” says King. “It sounds like an Olympic event, but it involves gently pulling the foreskin back to expose the tip of the glans to the point where the ring of scar is exposed.” In other words, pull your foreskin back until you can’t pull it back anymore, and you’ll be looking at the scar tissue. “Hold this position for one minute and repeat three to four times a day. In combination with topical application of a steroid cream twice daily, typically betamethasone 0.05 percent (needs a prescription), more than 90 percent of cases will dramatically improve or resolve within four to six weeks.”

And if you’re one of the 10 percent of phimosis sufferers whose case doesn’t improve through preputial gymnastics?

“Then he should break out the Manischewitz for his impending bris,” says King.

 

I have rarely ever been able to have an orgasm during intercourse. The few times it happened, I was stimulating my clit. Recently, I started mixing pot and sex. It is incredible! Marijuana relaxes my body and heightens my senses so that when my BF and I have sex, I come! And come and come—and I squirt, which I have NEVER done before! When we have sex without smoking, the sex is still great, but I don’t orgasm like I do when I’m high. Before I dated my BF, I smoked pot only once a month or so. Now I’m doing it once a week, at least. My sex life is finally amazing AND fulfilling. Three questions: (1) Does this sound like a huge problem? (2) Should I be worried? (3) What do you suggest?

Blazing Orgasms Newly Gained

 

1. It does sound like a problem—a problem that’s been solved.

2. Not if you live in Colorado or Washington State, BONG, where voters legalized pot use in last November’s election.

3. A vaporizer.

 

I am in a great relationship with a very sexy and open-minded woman. Recently, we were talking about likes and dislikes, and she mentioned “role-play scenes.” This sent me into a little bit of a panic since this is something I’ve never engaged in. However, since I am more on the dominant side in our relationship, I’d rather not ask her a lot of questions. I want to seem imaginative to her and not just copy what other men have done. Unfortunately, my web searches have been fruitless. Do you have any ideas about role-play scenarios—especially ones that could be initiated by a man?

Apprehensive About Role Play

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