Savage Love

By Dan Savage
Add Comment Add Comment | Comments: 0 | Posted Feb. 14, 2012

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I recently broke off a relationship after my female partner demanded that I get a circumcision. I told her I would get one if she did. She told me I was a sexist asshole. Am I wrong?

Uncut About Anchorage

You weren’t wrong to refuse to cut yourself for her, UAA, but you were wrong to equate “female circumcision” with male circumcision. A woman who’s been “circumcised”—a woman who has been subjected to genital mutilation— has had her clit cut off . The male equivalent would be the removal of the head of the cock, not the foreskin.

With all the stress of jobs, relationships, kids, etc., what’s your advice for romance and great sex when you’re overwhelmed by life?

Jack And Jill

My advice is to give up on great sex. Not forever, JAJ, but for now. Make time for some good-not-great, low-stakes, low-pressure, undemanding mutual masturbation sessions. Lie down together and get off while dirty talking about the truly great marathon sex sessions you’re gonna have once your stress levels drop. Then do it!

You have heard that an ordinance to protect LGBT people from being evicted or fired will be up for a vote in Anchorage soon. Well, I am a bi woman who works in an office where the environment is akin to the Fellowship of the Bros. Recently, I attended a pride event where a coworker saw me act in a very non-hetero way. I’m afraid this person will out me and I will be harassed at best and fired at worst. What can I do?

Unsafe At Work

Not much, sadly. LGBT people are not protected under the City of Anchorage’s antidiscrimination statutes. There have been three attempts to add protections for LGBT people to the law; all three failed after “Christian” activists protested, lied, demagogued, bullied mayors and lied some more.

One Anchorage—a coalition of progressive organizations—gathered enough signatures to put a equal rights initiative on the ballot in Anchorage. The vote is April 3, and passing Proposition 5 will make it illegal to discriminate against LGBT people in housing, public accommodation, employment and credit.

HEY, LGBT SUPPORTERS: We scored some big victories in the last two weeks. But as we race toward marriage equality in California, Washington, Maryland and New Jersey (don’t be such a fucking coward, Christie!), we should remember that there are LGBT people living in cities, counties and states without any civil-rights protections for queers. I hate to guilt folks into making political donations two weeks in a row—last week, Planned Parenthood, this week, One Anchorage—but One Anchorage could use our help. The haters are planning a big advertising campaign to block equality for LGBT people in Anchorage. One Anchorage needs to get on the air and counter the hate and lies. Donate here:

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