Week's Worst: Coldplay

Add Comment Add Comment | Comments: 6 | Posted May. 19, 2009

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I write this in the middle of a sensory storm of alternating devilish pain and angelic fluffy euphoria. On my left shoulder sits the mother of all urinary tract infections. On the right is an awesome and probably illegal cocktail of all the painkillers I’ve got lying around. Now you might expect the cosy, warm, super-nice drugs to be whispering, “Oh Coldplay are alright really.” And you might expect the urinary tract infection to be screaming die die die! atop hordes of Coldplay fans being crushed under a huge, pink, lank-barreled I HATE COLDPLAY tank driven by my aching uretha. But you’d be wrong. Both drugs and cock are agreed that Coldplay are the arthiritic and rickets-rotted knees of the world’s shittest bee. Me? I say a pox on both their houses. For while it’s true that Coldplay are an abomination, stating this in print is like dropping atom bombs into a bucket of already dead fish. (Steven Wells)


Tues., May 26, 7:30pm. $35-$97.50. With Pete Yorn and Howling Bells. Susquehanna Bank Center, 1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J. 856.365.1300. livenation.com

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Comments 1 - 6 of 6
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1. Anonymous said... on May 20, 2009 at 03:59AM

“you suck......”

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2. bigjok said... on May 20, 2009 at 02:05PM

“oh how clever another journo having a go at coldplay to get people to read his drivel. isnt the coldplay bashing getting a tad old

i for one are sick and tired of folk like you continuously having a pop at carphone. why not have the courage of your convictions and completely avoid any mention of coldplay.

douche alert”

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3. Anonymous said... on May 20, 2009 at 02:32PM

“Coldplay is to successful a band to be enjoyed by a hipster. Forty years from now it will be ok to like them if you are hipster, but not at the moment. Unfortunately for us this paper is written for and by hipsters and provides little value what so ever. I keep giving it a chance, then I read stuff like this.”

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4. carole said... on May 20, 2009 at 03:37PM

“how was pete yorn? i hear he's pretty decent”

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5. carole said... on May 20, 2009 at 03:37PM

“how was pete yorn? i hear he's pretty decent”

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6. Johnny boy said... on May 20, 2009 at 04:13PM

“Why wont the just die a long and painfull death already? Have the not done enough damage to the pop-culture landscape?”

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