Twisted Tail in Headhouse Square Lacks Heart

By Brian Freedman
Add Comment Add Comment | Comments: 5 | Posted Sep. 28, 2011

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In baaad taste: Lamb sliders with sundried-cranberry aioli fared slightly better than the rest of the items on the menu.

Photo by Ryan Strand

We look to the grill for lust, for the kind of joyous abandon that only seems to waft up from the smoky embers of wood or charcoal. Which is why the Twisted Tail is such a conundrum: For a restaurant that touts its charcoal-y acumen, there’s a curious, concerning lack of love to the food here. (The music, on the other hand, does it right, with a rotation of bluesmen and jazz ladies holding sway upstairs amid the sheet-music wallpaper and whitewashed bricks, the sound wafting downstairs like a particularly tuneful dream.)

Chef Michael Stevenson absolutely knows his way around a kitchen, his technique is soundly rooted, and his resume impressive (he was a chef at the Washington, D.C., Capital Grille, and personal chef to a number of top players on the Redskins). But perhaps that’s the problem: The cooking here is a bit too precious, too reliant on the alchemy of the open flame. The preparations I tasted often lacked that crucial scaffolding of abandon that characterizes the best examples of American grillery.

The “dueling ribs” appetizer came up short. So-called St. Louis Wuxi Asian ribs, pleasantly balanced between smoky and sweeter notes, was undermined by a minute or three too long on the heat, which resulted in tougher meat than necessary. Lemongrass, cilantro and ginger-kissed short ribs highlighted this particular appetizer, but those pleasures were quickly undermined by the acrid pacu-fish rib: The flesh acted like some kind of sponge for the smoke, and the result was like French kissing an ashtray. The complex marinade of mint, chervil and Son of a Peach ale was nowhere in evidence.

Crawfish macaroni and cheese failed for the opposite reason—it was devoid of much flavor at all. And in a place that pays homage to its supposed southern pedigree, a dull mac gratin is about as dissonant as a pubescent, never-been-in-love soul singer screeching out “You’re All I Need to Get By.” The crawfish on top actually detracted from the whole. Bland and mealy, these crustaceans were the icing on an altogether unfortunate cake.

Lamb sliders, their seam of gaminess well-cut by a sundried-cranberry aioli, fared better, as did crab cakes—as creamy and heartfelt as the mac was dull—with their crust of tangy kettle chips.

Osso bucco brulee also showed relatively well, though perhaps context was key here: its (perhaps too sweet) charred tomatoes overwhelmed, and its profile relied too heavily on sage. The ground veal inside too-thick ravioli skins could have used a bit more moisture, too. Still, this dish showed in spades what so much else here lacked: Heart. And that counts for a lot.

Special house-cured pork belly arrived as a crestfallen study in tans and earth tones, and the flavor followed suit. Aside from its pleasant rib-rub perfume, this pig was about as exciting as a concert featuring Michael Bolton singing alongside Kenny G. Lamb shoulder, too, was a curiosity: Sliced into careful petals, it was well-cooked, sure, but the cardamom, coriander and fresh orange juice it was treated to should have belted out their respective tunes with more volume and clarity. Garlicky parsnip-potato gratin in the center provided literal and figurative ballast, as well as excitement, but not quite enough.

Rum sauce and mascarpone cheese weren’t enough to lift a carrot cake from its dusty depths, but the fresh berry “mille feuille”—Grand Marnier pastry cream, lovely assorted berries, flaky pastry—provided much-needed life after the procession of odd quietude that preceded it.

Really, I just wanted more out of the Twisted Tail. Because there’s plenty to like about it: The bourbon and beer selections are well-considered—especially the option to taste one-ounce portions of the spirits, the better to explore the list more thoroughly—and the staff is pleasant. The music, too, is a needed addition to the neighborhood. But the food has to step it up, break free from its restraint, and let its wah-wah pedal reverberate. There’s lots of promise here, but I’m still waiting for the payoff. ■

509 S. Second St.
215.558.2471.
thetwistedtail.com

Cuisine: Homage to the charcoal grill.
Hours: Daily, 11am-2am.
Price range: $5-$29.
Atmosphere: Warm and comforting, especially when the music is playing.
Food: Needs to turn up the volume.
Service: Well-versed in the food and drink.

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COMMENTS

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1. Tom said... on Sep 28, 2011 at 09:28AM

“You are judging harshly. The food could be better but there is enough to choose from to make this the best thing to happen in blues bars in Philadelphia since my favorite place on South Street closed. The atmosphere, the music, the service, the bar - shame on you for this pissy review.”

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2. pete said... on Sep 28, 2011 at 06:34PM

“If they have the capital to operate at a loss for a
few years they might make it. The area is saturated
with pubs/restaurants and the foot traffic in the
daytime doesn't spend money. The foot traffic in
the evening is another story entirely.”

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3. Anonymous said... on Oct 7, 2011 at 01:15PM

“The detail to the decor and booze is on point. I'd have to imagine the owners will step it up and re-vamp the menu (maybe even the chef) to what people expect. The space and location is too great for people not to be interested.”

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4. will said... on Oct 8, 2011 at 04:23AM

“i dont care whats does,queers writens said abouth this place i think is good .love twisted tale good luck city pappers peoples come on ciyt is growing with new bussines.be proud dont be nasty be profesional

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5. Miss Badge said... on Feb 2, 2012 at 11:14PM

“T3 is a welcome breath of fresh air in both the local blues community as well as the South Street restaurants. The decor is great, liquor selection second to none and the bands are superb (including Mikey Jr and the Stone Cold Blues as the house band) with opportunities for local musicians to step it up at Open Jam Nights on Sundays. Though the price is a bit high for the plate value, I haven't had a bad meal there and have enjoyed fish, chicken and pork selections. They could stand to dumb down the menu and make it more traditional and savory southern food instead of the arty-fartsy failings that seem to have pissed in the proverbial cheerios of the PW gastrowriter.”

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