Philadelphia Weekly

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Ghost of Mary at Swift Half

Photo by Michael Persico

In 1988 Ronald Reagan (quite the elder statesman) proclaimed August 21st be reserved for an annual observance of the aged. Celebrate Senior Citizens’ Day with Grammy and Gramps by channeling your geriatric. Drive slower, be a bit cranky, poop your pants and frequent a few of Philly’s best discounted early bird specials—or as the younguns refer to them, happy hours. 

If You’re Mulling It Over
We’re still debating whether the Piazza at Schmidts is soulless or awesome. But one thing’s for sure: The Swift Half Pub (1001 N. Second St. 215.923.4600) has a happy hour to soothe your work-weary soul. Get $1 off all drinks on weekdays from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m., Saturday from 1 p.m. to 3 p.m. and Sunday from 10 p.m. to midnight. We like their Ghost of Mary, which is best described as an inverted green tomato Bloody Mary. We hear cheesecloth and a bucket are involved. C O P H

If You Want a Raw Deal
The Oyster House (1516 Sansom St. 215.567.7683) has been restored to its former glory and beyond, thanks to the takeover by third-generation seafood restaurateur Sam Mink. The place is stylish, the staff is gracious and the oysters are as fresh as they come. On weeknights from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m., the oyster du jour is a-buck-a-shuck. C $ H

If a Dollar Ain’t What It Used to Be
Aki Sushi & Sake (1210 Walnut St. 215.985.1838) has more discount deals than Crazy Eddie in the ’80s. From 4:30 p.m. to 7 p.m., this newly sexied-up sushi and sake shop has ice cold beers like Kirin Ichiban for $3 and cocktails (like the vodka and sake Saketini) for $5. You can also get half-price apps like shrimp shumai for $3 and sushi bar apps like yellowtail tartare with fish eggs for a fin. These prices are insaaaaane! H

If You’re Looking Forward to the Weekend
Take a step back in time and relive Philly’s restaurant renaissance at Friday Saturday Sunday’s Tank Bar (261 S. 21st St. 215.546.4232) from 5:30 p.m. to 7:30 p.m. on weeknights when the prices feel like they were assigned in the ’70s. All drinks are half-priced including their signature cocktails. (Try the Bumpy Sidecar, a twist on the original, rimmed with a sugar and crushed hazelnuts.) The snack menu is also easy on the wallet. We recommend the wasabi deviled eggs for $4. C H

If You Need a Bit of the Uppercrust
On weekdays from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m., live the good life on the cheap at Lacroix’s Bar 210 (210 W. Rittenhouse Square) in the Rittenhouse Hotel. Enjoy $6 cocktails, $5 wines and a revolving menu of free (yes, free!) hors d’oeuvres like tempura vegetables with a creamy peanut butter dipping sauce or the very playful veal corndog. Consider it a stimulus package for your stomach. C $ 

If You Value Creativity
The prize for most inventive happy hour goes to Memphis Taproom (2331 E. Cumberland St. 215.425.4460). Every first Tuesday of the month from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m., they do a Pittsburgh Transplant Happy Hour where you can get beers from the title town’s Penn Brewery and an Ode to a Primanti sandwich. If you’re not from the ’burgh, every first Wednesday get out your Sideshow Bob wigs because redheads get $1 off each draft. Just don’t order a redheaded slut; you might get slapped. C P H