Penn Relays

The nation’s oldest and largest collegiate track meet, where high school, college and professional track stars compete at the University of Pennsylvania’s historic Franklin Field.| Image: Visit Philadelphia

It’s that time of year where you look at the uber-crowded streets around University City and wonder, “where the hell did all these tourists come from?”

Well, it’s the 125th running (pun intended) of the Penn Relays. This three-day blowout features a host of track and field events from all different talents and categories. The best from middle school to professional will cause oohs, aahs and that familiar ‘whoop,’ when sprinters are coming around the final turn.

Boasts all the excitement and chaos of an Olympic event – at the University of Pennsylvania. Philly isn’t afraid to brag about its old age. The Penn Relays is the oldest U.S. track and field competition, having begun in 1895. But you’ll probably be feeling old as you watch sixth-grade boys in better shape than you ever were outrun you.

Take a break from all the over-hyped major league sports and appreciate local sportsmanship. The only thing you’ll regret is not getting to the gym sooner.

– ALEX NAGY | @ALEXBNAGY

WHAT: Penn Relays ; WHEN: April 25-27. 10am.; COST: Prices vary.; WHERE: Franklin Field, 235 S. 33rd St.; MORE:pennrelays.com

FRIDAY, APRIL 26

Learn | Renewed Love Power Workshop

We could all use a little work on our relationships, no matter how perfect we may think they are. Sit in on this workshop to learn how to mend things - powerfully. The ticket price is per couple, so we’ll leave it to you to argue over who’s going to foot the bill. 6:30 pm. $20. The Bank Building, 421 Chestnut St. eventbrite.com

Performance | Proud Out Loud: Open Mic and Showcase

Say it loud and say it proud this Black Pride month. Step up to the mic with fellow Philadelphians and lay some poetry on the crowd. It could be about anything, but it’d be especially great if you share whatever makes you most proud about being you. 8 pm. $11. A Poet Art Gallery, 4032 W. Girard Ave. eventbrite.com

Music | Overkill

The band lives up to its name by just being a little bit excessive. It’s a thrash band - you know they’ll be brutally in your face with their long, whipping hair and pounding beats - you just have to accept it. Overkill’s been in the game since the 80s, and just released the album “The Wings of War” at the end of February. If you can't picture what these guys look like, you know nothing about metal. 7 pm. $25. Theatre of the Living Arts, 334 South St. facebook.com

Music | Apple Juice Jones

Apple juice on Grape St. – sounds like a Fruit of the Loom commercial or something. Get your fructose fix at this show that definitely won’t leave you thirsty - or maybe it will if you go hard enough in the pit. Yes, there’s probably gonna be a pit in this grape, and if you don’t like it, you better eat around it. 7 pm. $8. The Grape Room, 105 Grape St. facebook.com

Outdoors | Sunset Toad Walk

This sounds nice - usually, all we see when we walk around at sunset is people waiting for the bus. This walk was carefully planned to happen during the American Toad’s breeding season, so maybe you’ll even see some getting busy. We can’t promise you’ll be so lucky, but you’ll definitely get a free education as you hear the toads sing their usual nighttime songs and learn how to report sightings. 7:30 pm. Free. Wissahickon Environmental Center, 300 W. Northwestern Ave. eventbrite.com

Party | Seductions Meet & Greet

Pitbull was right when he said “one’s company, two’s a crowd, and three’s a party.” If you and your partner are into this lifestyle, or you’re a single lady who wants to explore, feel free to join the party. The free buffet at the beginning of the night is sure to get some conversation going and help you meet some friends with benefits. 8 pm. Bucks Cabaret, 2908 S. Christopher Columbus Blvd. facebook.com

Music | Girlpool

Dive right in. We don’t really have an idea of who this band exactly is, but that’s how they want it to be. But hey, that’s what makes them “underground,” right? Fluidity and maturity seem to be the name of the game for this duo that’s constantly taking their music to the next level. | 9 pm. $15. Underground Arts, 1200 Callowhill St. ticketfly.com

Performance | Hot Flashbacks: A Golden Girls Musical Revue

The Golden Gays, a NYC drag trio, hot flash through Dorothy, Blanche and Rose’s most memorable moments in this live performance. Do you have what it takes to join them as Sophia? Find out - just bring your attitude and they’ll bring the glasses and wig. If we could be a fraction as fabulous as these women are when we’re that old, we’d be so damn proud. Then again, it’s just a TV show - I’m sure we’ll just be eating applesauce in our rocking chairs. 8 pm. $25. Franky Bradley’s, 1320 Chancellor St. ticketfly.com

SATURDAY, APRIL 27

Interests | East Passyunk Community Center Flea Market

Spring cleaning is over. Now it’s time to get all the tchotchkes and useless shit you don’t need! Flea markets are always perfect for that, and for bringing an entire neighborhood together. We’d like to think it’s more about the latter.  9 am. Free. East Passyunk Community Recreation Center, 1025 Mifflin St. eventbrite.com

Event | Femme Freedom Fundraiser

Even if our nation's President won't get on board, we stand by the fact that ALL women deserve dignity. This event provides some fun for a good cause. That cause is ensuring proper hygiene for all women during those...important periods regardless of background or social standing. The proceeds from this event which'll showcase a night of both great music and comedy will ensure feminine hygiene products, diapers and more make it into the hands of those who can benefit from it in our fair city. In summation, fun event for a noble cause. | 7pm. $10. Milkboy Philadelphia, 1100 Chestnut St. ticketfly.com/purchase/

Family Fun | Philly Butterfly Festival

All things butterfly will be celebrated at this all-day festival - live butterfly releases, gardening workshops, arts and crafts and more are all on the schedule. Butterflies are lucky - without those colorful wings, we’d probably scared to death of them. Personally, that “Wormy” episode of SpongeBob scarred us forever, but they really are just harmless and beautiful creatures - as far as we know.  10 am. $13-$16. Philadelphia Insectarium & Butterfly Pavilion, 8046 Frankford Ave. eventbrite.com

Interests | West Craft Fest

New name, new reason to go. Formerly known as “Go West Craft Fest,” this event is back and better than ever with more than 100 artists and “Tiny Circus,” which we can only assume is exactly what it sounds like. This is simply the perfect event for anyone with a crafty bone in their body. 11 am. Free. The Woodlands, 4000 Woodland Ave. facebook.com

Family Fun | Sheep Shearing Festival

You can really do anything in Philly – well, this is pretty much right on the border of the suburbs, but still. You get to watch the sheep be sheared and find out what’s done with the wool. This seems way too exciting to us. If it doesn’t sound so to you, there will also be games, food and live music, so there - that’s how you get anyone to go to an event. 12 pm. $3. Friends of Fox Chase Farm, 8500 Pine Rd. facebook.com

Art | 4/20 Came Late Exhibit

If you’re a true stoner, you’re either still celebrating 4/20 or are at least still high from it. Well, time to smoke up again and glare at some art that exhibits all about the culture of cannabis. Be part of the first 50 to enter and get a free poster of Bender from Futurama chiefing on a fat blunt. 6 pm. Prices vary. Philly Art Collective, 253 N. 3rd St. eventbrite.com

Outdoor | A Celebration of Planet Earth

Life is fucking weird. Here we are, living and breathing on this floating rock that is somehow being held up by some force we can’t see. Let’s not overthink it and let’s just celebrate the fact that we’re here in the first place. Vendors, music, food, drinks - all the typical festival stuff will be there. Donations at a wine and food bar will benefit the National Resources Defense Council, which is comprised of badass people who fight to protect everything that makes Earth so unique. 1 pm. $20. The Music Ward, 5101 Grays Ave. facebook.com

Learn | Kids’ Cooking Class

You’ve worked hard enough today, so make them cook dinner for you! If you didn’t have a kid to make them do things for you, then what did you have them for? Nonetheless, this seems like a great opportunity to teach your kids a skill that requires both creativity and necessity. 9 am. $15-$50. Maggiano’s Little Italy, 1201 Filbert St. eventbrite.com

Comedy | So Damn Funny Comedy Festival

You definitely won’t leave without howling at least once from laughter. This night is packed with comedians that each have impressive accomplishments of their own. Michael Blackson of “Next Friday” and “Def Comedy Jam” fame tops the lineup of one of the most exciting recent comedy shows in Philly. 8 pm. $40. The Liacouras Center, 1776 N. Broad St. liacourascenter.com

SUNDAY, APRIL 28

Music | Quaker City String Band Serenade

Great, now we have a fantasy of the Quaker Oats guy strumming us a sweet song on his guitar. Music will be played all day at this event which even includes a “serenade parade” with the famous Philly Mummers. AND Bob Kelly from Fox 29 will be there. Come on, you can’t miss the chance to see all your favorite Philly celebrities in one place. 1 pm. Free. Quaker City String Band, 1943 S. 3rd St. facebook.com

Music | Guerilla Toss

Space out to some synth-heavy bops that’ll blow your mind. Guerilla Toss is known for its ability to take listeners through a meditative trance. Come prepared by pre-tripping off their newest LP “Twisted Crystal.” 8 pm. $12. PhilaMOCA, 531 N. 12th St. ticketfly.com

Dance | Medicine Philly: Ecstatic Dance

Dance your ass off – or don’t – at this all-ages event designed to turn up the energy on lazy Philly Sundays. Dance however you want and relax however you feel – all that matters is the environment stays energetic and lively. Smoking and alcohol are banned so be ready for a genuinely fun experience. 6 pm. $15. Philadelphia Ethical Society, 1906 Rittenhouse Square. eventbrite.com

Music | April Didgeridoo Night

Don’t worry - you don’t actually need to have a didgeridoo lying around to join in on this jam session. All instruments and skill levels are welcome to play and to listen to the lessons and tips that’ll be given, like “Breathing Techniques & Beatboxing.” We recommend that you bring your talents to the table and learn something new. | 5 pm. Free. BridgeSet Sound, 710 South St. meetup.com

LGBTQ | Let’s Have a Kiki Drag Show

Oh, yes, sir. As defined by the credible Urban Dictionary, a kiki is a “good party with good friends” that “may involve locked doors, tea and salacious gossip.” Stir it up at this gathering hosted by drag kings. 8 pm. Free. Toasted Walnut, 1316 Walnut St. facebook.com

Event | Holocaust Memorial Ceremony

This is the 55th annual ceremony of remembrance in Philly for the Jewish victims of the Holocaust. Gather at the Memorial to the Six Million Jewish Martyrs for music, prayers and a candle lighting. By remembering and mourning these losses every year, the Holocaust’s effects will never be forgotten. 1 pm. Free. Levy Park, 1635 Arch St. jewishphilly.org

Interests | DIY Kombucha

Pretty self-explanatory. Learn how to brew your own so you won’t have to get it for $5 a bottle at Whole Foods anymore. All the supplies to make your first half gallon are provided, and the lesson is given by Olga of Phoenixville’s Baba’s Bucha. 11 am. $30. The Mercantile, 542 Carpenter Ln. eventbrite.com

Discussion | Credit & Cocktails

Proper financial advice is always discussed over a drink or two. Bad credit is more damaging than a bad reputation - learn how to turn it around with some valuable guidance. Maybe you could finally get that apartment in Fishtown that requires a 750 credit minimum. 6:30 pm. Free. Super Realty Group, 308 N. 64th St. eventbrite.com

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