Philadelphia Weekly

>>CONTEST

Moustachio Bashio
Tues., Nov. 20, 8pm. Free. Ten Stone, 21st and South sts. 215.735.9939. www.tenstone.com

The question on everybody's upper lips: What, exactly, is the Moustachio Bashio? The brainchild of resident Ten Stone pranksters Brenna McGinnis and Papaya, the Bashio is a good old-fashioned mustache contest. Roll up and put your tickler to the test. Does your soup strainer make the rest of the field look like peach fuzz? Got a cookie duster that's more of a muffin mopper? Come on down, then, 'cause it's straight Mo-vember (as the month has been renamed by antipodean face fungus fanatics) at the Stone. A celebrity panel of judges including Markos Kapes (and his horseshoe Manchu) along with Skull (seriously, is it even possible to hold a proper mustache contest without a guy named Skull?) will adhere to a strictly nonsensical point system to determine the winners. The always-popular "various prizes" will be awarded to the most diabolical (think Snidely Whiplash and Dick Dastardly) and the high-handlebar holy of holies, the "Tom Selleck Would Be Proud" 'stashe. In a stunning display of largesse, the organizers have even instituted categories covering fake mustaches--opening wide the windows of opportunity so the glory of grooming greatness can be grasped by all. (Joshua Valocchi)

>>EVENT

'Corn star: 'Remember Me' is PhilCon artist of honor Sue Dawe's tribute to fantasy.

Philadelphia Conference on Science Fiction and Fantasy
Fri., Nov. 16, 5pm. $20-$50. Thru Sun., Nov. 18. Sheraton Hotel, 17th and Race sts. 215.448.2000. www.psfs.org

The Philadelphia Science Fiction Society, one of the oldest of its kind, should be counted among this city's gems. Its annual Philcon convention should be celebrated with as much enthusiasm as the Eagles' opening day. Science fiction is, after all, just as ecstatically American. Despite its humble roots in fringey pulp magazines, SF now dominates culture. Think of Thomas Pynchon's Gravity's Rainbow, Don Delillo's White Noise, Stanley Kubrick's 2001 or Michel Gondry's Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. No other genre has so permeated every corner of high and low art. So why isn't everyone gearing up for the Philcon cultural superbanger? Probably because--true to stereotype, sadly--science fiction fandom is an insular subculture with way more than its fair share of misanthropic, myopic, self-absorbed weirdos (all from out-of-town, of course). But given the ubiquity of their genre, maybe that arrogance is justified. The world does actually revolve around them. (Jeremy Butman)

>>EVENT

Ooh la lap dog: Toy poodles - like all dogs -share 99.8 percent of their DNA with wolves.

The National Dog Show
Sat., Nov. 17-Sun., Nov. 18, 8:30am-5pm. $6-$12. Pennsylvania Convention Center, 11th and Arch sts. 215.418.4700. www.philadogshow.com

In a dog show, dogs don't technically compete against one another. For example in conformation shows--the most common type of dog show--dogs compete to see which one best fits the breed standard. After all, it's hard to compare a bull mastiff to a cocker spaniel. Why the lesson? Because the dog show is in town. The annual competition, hosted by the Kennel Club of Philadelphia, was pushed out to the suburbs in recent years but now returns to the Convention Center. John O'Hurley, of Dancing With the Stars and Seinfeld fame, MCs Saturday's events (which will be filmed and then broadcast on Thanksgiving Day), and is scheduled for a book signing. But the prospect of hundreds of awesome hounds romping around all day will probably be the bigger draw. (Daniel McQuade)

>>NIGHT WATCH

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Take a Load Off
Fri., Nov. 16, 10pm-2:30am. $3. Club Ruba, Fifth and Green sts. 215.627.9831