Philadelphia Weekly

>>lez we forget
Lesbians on Ecstasy
Sat., Dec. 29, 9pm. $8. With Bugs in the Dark + Fuse DJs. Tritone, 1508 South St. 215.545.0475. www.tritonebar.com

The name itself implies frenzied, bare-breasted debauchery, and Montreal's Lesbians on Ecstasy provide just that, but with a sharp-toothed wit that interrupts your electropunk dance-floor lust-sesh with a self-reflexive head scratch when you realize you're glitching out to totally defiled samples from the vault of dyke music past. Lezzies on X recontextualize queer folk and rock songs, turning k.d. lang, the Indigo Girls and '70s womyn's music into something you're not embarrassed to listen or move to in public. Lezzies on X are already huge within the queercore scene. It's only a matter of time before they go the way of Peaches and fuck the heteros' pain away too. (C.G.)

HSM: The Ice Tour

For anyone over the age of 5, the real allure of those Disney on Ice spectaculars has always been the prospect of a gigantic foam creature taking an unpleasantly hilarious spill. Put Nemo on skates and gravity does the rest. But Disney on Ice is no longer just princesses, superheroes and cartoon buffoons for the preschool set. After conquering TVs, stereos, stages and middle school hearts across the world, the intergenerational cash cow that is High School Musical has met its most challenging medium yet: the ice. No, Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens will not be showcasing some secret triple-salchow talent (this isn't Fox's Skating With Celebrities; besides, can you imagine the insurance?). Instead, a group of C-list skaters--with the help of a prerecorded soundtrack--will take on the roles that made A-list stars out of dimple-faced unknowns. If you couldn't get tix to that Hannah Montana blow-out last week, this could be your chance to show your kids (or your grownup girlfriend) how much you really care. (Caralyn Green)

>>balls out
First Ladies Etiquette Workshop
Wed., Dec. 26, 11am and 1pm. Through Dec. 31. $15. National Constitution Center, 525 Arch St. 215.409.6700. www.constitutioncenter.org

If you yearn for powerful men, crustless cucumber sandwiches and polite conversation, the National Constitution Center has an event that'll knock your bloomers off. The Center has been running an exhibit on the public image and political role of national first ladies, showcasing personal belongings, campaign materials and other historical items. In the Delegate's Restaurant, specially prepared meals showcase favorite foods of the first ladies themselves. Between noon and 4 p.m. visitors can meet with "Gloria," who'll share stories of life in the Kennedy White House while she sets up for their tea, and an "inaugural ball" will take place twice daily. Included in the fanfare is the opportunity to learn exactly what it takes to be the better half of the man in charge. (Amanda O'Mahony)

>>COLT FOLLOWING
Datarock
Mon., Dec. 31, 9pm. $25-$30. With Juiceboxx and DJs Low B, Brendan Bring 'Em + Dee Jay. Electric Factory, 421 N. Seventh St. 215.627.1332. www.paper-street.com

"Dude, I'm with the band and I'm totally going backstage." This New Year's Eve you can, as Datarock headlines an indie/rock/dance-party extravaganza at the Electric Factory. Backstage is open to everyone, with DJ Dee Jay playing anything you can shake your hips to. On the main stage Juiceboxxx is back to rock out and climb speakers while Low B, fresh off tour with M.I.A., and Brendan Bring 'Em take care of DJ duties. Datarock will perform and DJ, so you get a double-shot of tracksuit-inspired electro-rock, computer-camp jams. Festivities start at 9 p.m. with free Colt 45 flowing until 11 p.m. It's a night guaranteed to introduce you to new acquaintances you'll forget before next year. (Di1)